43 Day's and counting!!!!

Happy New Year!!!!!!

The last few weeks have been so hard for this adopting mommy... but in the gracious and amazing way our heavenly Father works... our prayers have been answered!!!! On Friday 1/6/12 we received an email from CAN's telling us we have been cleared to travel and we are scheduled for the Feb 20-24th Family Bonding Trip to HAITI!!!! We are going to meet our girls!!!! We are just so overwhelmed it's really hard to put into words...

I have mutiple lists going already.. frantically searching for plane tickets... dreaming of meeting our girls for the first time... this is ~ AMAZING!

We will have two appointment on our first trip as well. One to the Haitian Court where we will simply sign a "notebook"...(have no idea what this is really about, just know it's a step we must do) The second will be to the US Embassy where we will be "sworn in" and under oath answer questions... again... no idea what this really means or what it's for... but we'll just do what they say we must do to get to our goal of bringing our two beautiful daughters home! We do not know after this trip how long it will be for everything to be finalized... God knows though and we rest in that!

We will get to meet other families that are adopting from the same orphanage and we are so excited for that... to meet their children and being forming life long friendships with families going through EXACTLY what we are going through. I love how God brings people into your life ... for such a time as this!

Our prayer request is for the provision to pay for the trip and next adoption payments as well as for our hearts... it's hard not to think of the day we have to leave Haiti and come home without our girls this time... I can't imagine what that will be like... but we choose to rejoice... God has a plan and He is unfolding it before our eyes.... He is our comfort and our strength... He is our provider!

Being a "mommy in waiting".....

I de believe after all I've been through in my life-- this adoption journey is the hardest-most emotional roller coaster ride I've ever been on. Such joy- anxiety- fear- frustration- pain- heart ache-and amazing blessings all wrapped up into one "life expierence". This journey toward being a Mom has taught me more about myself that I ever expected to know. God had stretched me in ways I never thought I could survive.

Everyday and every night my thoughts are consumed by my daughters... when will we get to meet them?... When will we be bringing them home?.... What are they doing this exact moment?... Will they adjust well to our forever family or will we struggle?... Will we be able to handle leaving Haiti after our first trip over to meet them?... What will their personalities be like?... Will they like chocolate?... What will our first Christmas be like?... Will they be athletic and creative?... How am I going to help them with "new math"?.... and on, and on, and on it goes.... I find some peace in knowing God knows the answers to all these questions... and God knows my human weaknesses and faults... and I truly believe He is equipping both Darren and I into being the parents He needs us to be for these precious little girls... As we wait... we do fund-raising... praying... decorating their room... praying... creating a play room for them... praying... paperwork and updating...praying... reading parenting books.... and PRAYING

Bitter and Sweet

Thanksgiving has come and gone... it was a lovely day spent in fellowship and food with our families... but it was a day spent thinking of our girls non-stop.. wondering what they were doing... wondering what our first Thanksgiving with them here will be like.... dreaming... wishing... hoping... praying... Bitter & Sweet~ That seems to be how we spend everyday right now.

We are currently/slowly working on their bedroom... it's fun and exciting but creates a deeper longing in our hearts. I walk in there room almost daily and look at the two little empty twin beds and wonder what it will be like to go in there and see them snuggled in thier beds, playing in their room with their toys ....This feels like the longest pregnancy EVER! Not that I know what it "feels' like to be pregnant... but I do understand the longing- anticipation- excitment....

The furter into this journey we get- the more we can see how deeply invested our friends and family are in this journey too.... and that is a huge blessing and a great comfort to us. We talk non-stop about the process, the girls, our plans, our prayers..... on and on and on... and we are never faced with the feeling that the people close to us are tired of hearing it... we find they are just as anxious to hear, plan and pray! We are so blessed!

Milestones

This is such a journey of faith. Such a journey of high "highs" and low "lows"... such a journey that will tear your heart out... stretch you like taffy on an old fashion taffy machine (thanks for the symbolize Dawn!)... Today is a milestone for these waiting parents. Our Dossier has officially been delivered to the Creche in Port-au-Prince, Haiti! We still have 2-3 months wait before we can expect to be invited to travel and meet our girls... but this is a good, good day!!!!

We love you Sheldine & Nephtalie!!!

Heavy Hearted Parents

This has been such a rollercoaster ride... on Sat. morning I receieved an email saying our Dossier had been sent to Haiti... I was so overjoyed I sat at my compter crying!!! We were walking on air....so thrilled to have our Dossier finally on the move! Then comes Monday... another email from our agency telling us there had been a miscommunication and our Dossier is still sitting in Austin, TX. waiting for one document to come back from the Haitian Consulate... frustration... anxiety... saddness.... There is a document that came back from the Haitian Consulate stamped incorrectly... and to date, our agency still has not received it back ... nor can they get any information as to it's whereabouts...

We want to go meet our girls... to start bonding with them and sharing our hearts with them... it just feels like we will never get there... that there is no light at the end of this long dark tunnel.

We prayed this morning that we would continue to trust in God's perfect timing... trust that He is in control... trust that He knows exactly where that one missing document is....trust that He would hold us together through this ... trust that He has a plan and a purpose in all this ...

Our hearts are already in Haiti....... not much we can do but sit and wait... and pray

From 2 to 4

Today we began to assemble the room across the hall for our girls! We have a long way to go before we have the house organized... arranged.., and all set up for the arrival of our kiddos-- but we are so excited to have these project ahead of us... will keep us busy for sure!

It was surreal sitting in their room today... Darren sitting on one bed, and me on the other....talking about what bed each girl would choose... their little Clifford dog's (purchased by Auntie Tania & Uncle Dana... Meghan & Olivia)... sitting on each bed... we will be turning our house from a two person home to a lively- exciting- house of four!!!

Frustration and Longing

We are still waiting for our Dossier to finish up the process stateside! Two weeks ago today our documents were mailed to Washington D.C. for the authentication process. We have not heard back as to the status of that. After this step, our documents go back to Austin, TX.... then hopefully very quickly off to the orphanage in Haiti... THEN... our POA presents them to the IBESR (Haitian Social Services) for acceptance..... then we can travel!

This week is the family bonding trip that we hoped to be on. We are so excited for the families that are over in Port-au-Prince spending time loving on their kids... but our hearts hurt that we are not there with our girls! The next family bonding trip is the first week in December, so our prayer now is that God would open the floodgates for the finances to come through for the trip and for our documents to get moving and to the point where we have the invite to travel for that next trip. What a wonderful Christmas gift that would be!!!!